Why I Still Believe Ministry Is a Gift—Even When I Don't Feel It
- Joshua Krepel
- 1 hour ago
- 2 min read
“Of this gospel I was made a minister according to the gift of God’s grace, which was given me by the working of his power” (Ephesians 3:7 ESV).
I remember it like it was yesterday—driving a U-Haul from St. Louis to Albany, New York, with my wife after Seminary. I remember walking into my office for the first time and feeling overall joy and excitement. If there were any negative emotions that were part of that day—or walking into worship, meetings, Bible studies, or any other part of pastoring—I don’t remember them. I remember other seasoned pastors telling me my excitement, enthusiasm, and joy would wane. I trusted their wisdom. I just didn’t think it would be true for me.
Some days, I’m not sure anymore.
I don’t feel the same way walking into worship or meetings or Bible studies. And although I am in Colorado now, with a better office and a mountain view, the excitement and joy that I had hoped would always accompany the gift of ministry just isn’t the same. In fact, the old joke about the wife telling her husband he has to go to church because he is the pastor—that’s more me than not most days.
In Ephesians 3:7, Paul puts two things together in a jarring way: minister and gift. Theologically, we can discuss and dissect if Paul means that grace is the gift, and Paul simply gets to live out his vocation (or earthly duties) because of that grace. Or if Paul being called into ministry is itself a gift that exists because of Jesus. Both are fair, and although I probably prefer the first, it is undeniable that gift and minister are so close together.
Also, as I read Paul, I get the distinct feeling that he enjoys what God has called him to—or at minimum has a deep appreciation that God put him where he is.
Barna did studies after the pandemic showing that upwards of 40% of pastors had considered quitting. That number has improved some, though not because ministry suddenly got easier. I stayed, but if I’m honest, I wanted to be done—and some days I still do.
So where is the gift that Paul seems to have? Where is the joy of my early ministry? Where is the excitement? Has God simply taken the gift of ministry away?
No. Ministry is a gift because GOD SAYS SO.
Every Communion Sunday, we as Lutherans point people to the Lord’s Supper and say Jesus is there. Why? Now history and the Bible are on our side for this deep theological point, but at the end of the day, Jesus is in, with, and under the bread and wine because He says so.
Ministry is a gift because He says so.
As I write this, I don’t feel that. That was not my experience walking into my office today, and it did not change with me reading the above verse or with writing this.
But for today, I am going to take God at His word—and reminding myself, and pray that He would remind me when I am too weak:
Ministry is a gift because GOD SAYS SO. Praying that over you today as well.