Start with WHY, Lead with HOW: Helping Others Win in Ministry

Tania Hilton
Oct 6
4 min read

When it comes to leadership, most of us are familiar with Simon Sinek’s phrase Start with WHY. We teach it in leadership courses, and for good reason. When leaders clarify the “why,” they ignite passion and sustain focus for the organization. In ministry, our ultimate WHY is not one we invent on our own. It starts with Christ Himself: Go and make disciples of all nations (Matthew 28:19). Most church organizations then take it one step further and personalize it to their ministry context.

In my context, we’ve embraced Christ's mission through our vision statement: To see lives transformed by Jesus Christ. This lights me up. I know I have been called to be a part of something bigger than me, that I get to see people’s lives transformed by Christ, just as He transformed my own life. This gets me up in the morning!

We always begin with the WHY. The mission and vision keep us grounded. But recently, while reading Fourteen Fridays by Matt Engel and Eric Swanson, I came across a fresh twist that really stuck with me: Start with H.O.W. In this context, H.O.W means Helping Others Win.

This isn’t about replacing the WHY; it’s about what follows. Once we’re rooted in mission, the next step is to live and lead in ways that help others succeed. That’s where kingdom leadership takes shape.

What Does Helping Others Win Look Like?

Helping others win means refusing to operate in silos. It’s easy in ministry to get tunnel vision, focusing only on “my” team, “my” goals, and “my” programs. But God’s mission is bigger than any one leader or ministry.

Helping others win could look like:

A worship leader promoting a youth ministry event from the stage, knowing it will bless families.
A children’s ministry leader encouraging parents to attend a marriage retreat hosted by another team.
A ministry leader connecting a member to a serving role in a ministry outside her own area because it better fits their passion and gifts.
A leader stepping in to serve behind the scenes, not to draw attention but simply to support another ministry’s success.

These are small examples, but they add up. When leaders take this posture, the entire church grows stronger.

The Scriptural Picture of Helping Others Win

Scripture gives us plenty of examples of leaders helping others win.

Moses and Joshua: Moses didn’t just lead Israel; he invested in Joshua, preparing him to carry the mission forward. His willingness to step aside so Joshua could lead was an act of humility and faith (Deuteronomy 31:7–8).
Barnabas and Paul: Barnabas was called the “son of encouragement” for a reason. When others doubted Paul, Barnabas vouched for him (Acts 9:27). Later, he encouraged John Mark even after Paul was ready to move on (Acts 15:37–39). Barnabas didn’t need the spotlight—he helped others win.
Jesus and His disciples: The ultimate example is Christ Himself. He sent His disciples out two-by-two, giving them authority to heal, teach, and proclaim the kingdom (Mark 6:7–13). Jesus didn’t hoard the ministry; He empowered His followers to step into it.

In each case, leadership wasn’t about protecting personal influence. It was about equipping others to succeed, even if that meant taking a back seat.

What Good Leaders Do

When I think about leaders who help others win, a few qualities stand out. Good leaders celebrate others’ wins. When a ministry reaches new people, a good leader rejoices, even if it wasn’t their own team. Paul captures this spirit in Philippians 1:18 when he says, “The important thing is that in every way… Christ is preached. And because of this I rejoice.”

Good leaders share credit. They resist the temptation to spotlight themselves. Instead, they highlight their teams. Just as Jesus sent out the seventy-two disciples and then celebrated their return (Luke 10:17–20), good leaders take joy in what their people accomplish.

Good leaders know their people. Helping others win requires more than surface-level awareness. You can’t match someone to the right opportunity if you don’t know them deeply. What are their passions? What skills are they developing? Do you know their kids’ names, or what energizes them outside of church? Good leaders see the whole person, not just the role they fill as a volunteer or staff member.

Know and Match

That leads us to an important principle: Know and Match.

Know your people: their strengths, weaknesses, passions, and personalities.
Match them to opportunities where they can grow and serve with joy.

This might involve giving someone a competency-based stretch assignment, such as asking a gifted organizer to lead a ministry project. Or, it could be a spiritual assignment, like encouraging a leader to step out and pray aloud for the first time. Some need to grow in character, others in confidence, and others in specific skills. The key is discerning which kind of growth moment fits each person.

And yes, sometimes it means knowing when not to stretch. Pushing someone too far too fast can discourage them. Wise leaders balance challenge with support, always aiming for growth without burnout.

The Call to Leaders

So let me ask you: How well do you know the people who report to you? Do you know where they need to grow? Do you know where they struggle or even if they possess a hidden gift they rarely talk about? Are you intentional about helping them succeed, not just in ministry tasks but in their walk with Christ?

Good leaders aren’t threatened by others’ wins. They’re fueled by them. They don’t cling to credit. They share it freely. They don’t operate in silos. They collaborate.

Because at the end of the day, leadership isn’t about building our own ministries. It’s about building God’s kingdom. And the way we do that is by starting with WHY, the mission given to us in Christ, and then leading with HOW—helping others win.

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